Tsukihime fan fic help

[Shikitohno]

Ok, guys I have been working on a Fan-fiction for Tsukihime that I have been working on for a few weeks at... http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9442830/1/Tsuihime-Alternative

The people on the site I have been posting it on have not been giving me much to work with on suggestions, so I am making this topic to hopefully get some feed back. I will give a brief description in a spoiler bellow just in case anyone is in fact interested in reading this.

Of course the main character is Shiki accept thing are different about him in this... I guess timeline. Not all of his memories from living in the Tohno mansion are gone, he has been training underneath a mysterious master in fighting and using his eyes for the past eight years, and some time he is a lot colder then he was in the manga.

...I am also trying to figure out a good name for a one of the enemies I came up with that is a vampire who uses snake familiars for all of his attacks, so if anyone can think of something I would appreciate it.