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Posted

Too lazy to take this somewhere else, but how can you friendzone someone before they confess to you? Like how can you make someone understand that you have no feelings for her if she's giving you signs and yes I am too lazy to take this to the Advice thread :sachi:

 Not only do I not love her romantically, I am not ready for a relationship either if that's what she's going at.

You know what I want to say? You know it right? :makina:

 

confesson : I would like that people are motivated for their project. It seriously lack of passion sometime. :vinty:

Posted

Too lazy to take this somewhere else, but how can you friendzone someone before they confess to you? Like how can you make someone understand that you have no feelings for her if she's giving you signs and yes I am too lazy to take this to the Advice thread :sachi:

I know this might be awkward method, but you could just casually ask, "you don't like me more than a friend, do you?" and see what she says.  If she says no, can just laugh it off as a joke xD.  If yes, then can try to tell her that you're not interested in her in a nice way, somehow. (but~ maybe that's weird for a guy to use.. I dunno.  I've done that before though, lol)

 

You could also just ignore/avoid, and hopefully she'll get it and goes away... but do this only if you don't care about losing the friendship.

Posted

Too lazy to take this somewhere else, but how can you friendzone someone before they confess to you? Like how can you make someone understand that you have no feelings for her if she's giving you signs and yes I am too lazy to take this to the Advice thread :sachi:

Want the full story? Here:

There's this girl who was a friend of a friend and I knew her from that friend and she lives in another governorate that's like 400 km away.She's older than me by one year. She was going through her senior year exam , she went through lots of hardships and she was on the verge of breaking down (for example basically she knew another guy and loved him but he just brought himself to love her and didn't really love her, it was a failure and that left her heartbroken and made her unable to study). Someway or another according to her, from how I talked to her, I saved her from breaking down and made her able to go on and get good grades despite doing very badly on the first exam (I don't even know). She's going to come to the capital (where I live) and enroll on a college her. Anyways during her senior year, she started getting closer to me.  She even asked me if I had a crush . She helped me confess to my crush and then told me to forget her and that I deserve better than her,  now she talks to me everyday and has always been saying stuff like I love you for some time (not taking this as a confession , ok? ok), you are the nicest guy I have seen, I wish I will marry someone like you in the future, I have never talked to even any of my friends about my secrets as much as I did to you, I wish I had someone like you besides me who will help me move forward and not hinder my progress (reference to her previous bf) .... etc.... HALP. Not only do I not love her romantically, I am not ready for a relationship either if that's what she's going at.

 

 

This looks like quite the predicament… Eventually you guys will have to talk about this. I can somewhat understand your stance. I take it you don’t want her to waste her time pursuing you when you know she absolutely has no or very little chance. In my opinion, try to directly approach this topic, after confirming that she is trying to pursue you (well.. the signs are pretty obvious like you said). You don’t have to be blunt right off the bat, but steer the topic to romance at one point. Be direct. When it comes to romance, I feel like most people tend to be quite stubborn. Their mind is clouded by their own bias. They interpret words/actions in a way that fits their optimistic (or pessimistic) agenda. This is the reason why people can take minor things and expand it to like “She stared at me for 3 seconds. oh, does this mean he/she likes me. Is he/she checking me out?” (Amongst many other minor things that gets taken out of proportion).

 

People are also willing to cling to any small hope they can find. It’s best for you to slightly crush her hopes/dreams a bit so she can move on in reality (and find better opportunities). Others might disagree with me on this approach as it can be quite cruel. An alternative will be just keep things the way they are, not letting it get anywhere.

 

But in my opinion, be direct and hope that she gets the message. Goodluck.

Posted

This looks like quite the predicament… Eventually you guys will have to talk about this. I can somewhat understand your stance. I take it you don’t want her to waste her time pursuing you when you know she absolutely has no or very little chance. In my opinion, try to directly approach this topic, after confirming that she is trying to pursue you (well.. the signs are pretty obvious like you said). You don’t have to be blunt right off the bat, but steer the topic to romance at one point. Be direct. When it comes to romance, I feel like most people tend to be quite stubborn. Their mind is clouded by their own bias. They interpret words/actions in a way that fits their optimistic (or pessimistic) agenda. This is the reason why people can take minor things and expand it to like “She stared at me for 3 seconds. oh, does this mean he/she likes me. Is he/she checking me out?” (Amongst many other minor things that gets taken out of proportion.

 

People are also willing to cling to any small hope they can find. It’s best for you to slightly crush her hopes/dreams a bit so she can move on in reality (and find better opportunities). Others might disagree with me on this approach as it can be quite cruel. An alternative will be just keep things the way they are, not letting it get anywhere.

 

But in my opinion, be direct and hope that she gets the message. Goodluck.

Funny Fact: it's always other that think I or a friend have a thing for the other but never ourself xD

well since I give/have hug or lap pillow pretty easily I can understand why people think so :sachi:

 

 

Just tell her she's like a sister to you. Kills all possibility of romance.

.......................well considering it's Shameful this argument is kinda......................you see what I mean right? RIGHT? :makina:

Posted

People are also willing to cling to any small hope they can find. It’s best for you to slightly crush her hopes/dreams a bit so she can move on in reality (and find better opportunities). Others might disagree with me on this approach as it can be quite cruel. An alternative will be just keep things the way they are, not letting it get anywhere.

Which is more cruel? :P Totally dropping someone as a friend ignoring/avoiding them because they've crushed on you, and that's your way of helping them move on... or giving them the choice to stay friends after confronting, but could risk them pining for you?

Posted

Which is more cruel? :P Totally dropping someone as a friend ignoring/avoiding them because they've crushed on you, and that's your way of helping them move on... or giving them the choice to stay friends after confronting, but could risk them pining for you?

IRL crushes are cruel either way, best stick to 2D waifus :wafuu:

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