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Nah, I feel you on this one. I like it when the writing has a point to it, but it doesn't seem to be the case for this one. Sure, she's an edgy teen who thinks others are trash—like almost any teen—but the pretentious writing makes me feel not care for her. She just sounds very emo (lol)

The description of issues with the prose reminds me of another VN that I thought has issues: Double Exposure. At the time, I wrote a vndb note with (among other things): A kind of cool concept with some nice moments both cute and tense. But god, the prose for the viewpoint character Serena and her narration is really bad. When you try to write something flowery — with big words and all that jazz — you really need to be on the ball, and the frequent awkward phrasings and plain misuses of words on show here fall very short of the mark. This also spills over into Lizzie's dialogue, which at times feels unnatural. I think I'm a bit unusually sensitive to this, as I realized when I discussed how turned off I had been with lesiak (I think I picked up the VN after he discussed it briefly in a post, so naturally I had to complain at him for a bit). Overall, I think the point I made in my old remark that writing more plainly is the safer option for most writers is very relevant. Most writers in VNs just are not good enough — often have not read enough in that style to know what is good — to make it work. I will be much more forgiving of writing that is a bit plain than writing with the ornamentation put on all wrong. But maybe it's just me.

If we're specifically talking about lighthearted story VNs with a highschool cast: Ao no Kanata no Four Rhythm Maji de Watashi ni Koi Shinasai! Koi to Senkyo to Chocolate Princess Evangile (?) Those are probably some of them that don't directly instantly pander to male audiences with fanservice... maybe. I put Princess Evangile with a (?) because I'm still reading it right now, but it hasn't been too bad so far. For the other recommendations, I'm basically seconding the ones from Key. I don't think you can go wrong with them, and if you happen to not like the first title you'll pick up from them, you probably won't like the others by some default criteria. Have fun trying out everyone's recommendations!

Welcome to the forums! Nice to meet you too. Hopefully your projects are going smoothly! It's always nice to see people create things from works that they love. Rooting for you!

Little Busters! If You're Using 'English Edition', Use This Guide Summary Riki was a child when his parents died, leaving him hopeless and depressed. What saved him was a group of four kids calling themselves the Little Busters. They took Riki out and played with him during his time of need. He really enjoyed being together with them, and his grief gradually faded away. Now in his second year of high school they still hang out, fight and live together, and enjoy their school life. Ending Guideline / Suggested Route Order (Important! Please read) Route Guideline Kamikita Komari Good End Bad End Natsume Rin Good End Kurugaya Yuiko Good End Saigusa Haruka Good End Bad End Noumi Kudryavka Good End Bad End Nishizono Mio Good End Bad End After you complete all character's routes you now must replay Rin's route and follow the newly unlocked choices which I included in her route's walkthrough and that will complete Rin's route and unlock the Refrain chapter. Refrain Good End Bad End You've now beaten the game and got the true ending, congratulations. Below are some extra routes that you might want to check out but do not add anything to the story, still I felt like it should be posted to help out anyone that wants to do every little thing possible in Little Busters! Muscle Sensation Good End Mask the Saito Good End Unknown Lifeform Good End Attribution This walkthrough was put together and edited by me using the following sources: http://tlwiki.org/?title=LB!:Walkthrough http://solazoranoaozora.wordpress.com/2013/06/22/little-busters-refrain-walkthrough/#more-511