Blackout: Time 0 Chapter 1

[EndoCreations]

Endo Creations are proud to announce that the first chapter of BlackOut: Time Zero is available to download for free for Windows and Mac on here:

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Please leave a feedback as that would really be appreciated considering this is our first game. 

Have a look at some of the game backgrounds below.  

 

 

[Zakamutt]

[Zakamutt]

Okay, here's some feedback:

It starts in with the UI in Italian (I'm using jp system locale like many jp vn players). Not too hard to change, but might be a bad move.

 

*"Lenguages", "Full Sreen", and "No Suound" are obvious typos in the en settings. "Speed Text" should be "Text Speed" at the very least, Auto Play might want a "speed" added to it. I'm also opposed to instant text as the default, but that's prolly just me... (I prefer 90~95% up the scale usually).

*The options under "Skip" aren't obvious what they do to me. I feel like it's based on natural language rather than grouping together things that actually affect the same-ish thing, which is not how I'm not used to these menus looking - mostly talking about "After Choices" here, as it breaks the assumption of the others which seems to be "Whenever skipping, do X".

*And what's the scroll bar Oo... guess I'll try it out. I still have no idea what this did if anything

 

Credits screen has 2 errors as well - "Traslations", and one line being randomly indented.

 

http://i.imgur.com/zjL6BYk.png

Help screen is... fully understandable and pretty ugly. Nearly all the lines have something off about them - there's also no consistency in the wording, compare "Advancing dialogue" and "Advance the dialogue". What you want is either "Advances dialogue" - essentially short for
"this button advances the dialogue", which you never used, or the "Advance dialogue" - "When you press this button, you ___".   

Idk if this is intentional but left/right column alignment seems off as well.

 

All in all you need to have someone who knows English well check and rewrite the UI because it's honestly a mess.

 

what does this mean I don't know Italian

(seems to be from https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Nicene_and_Post-Nicene_Fathers:_Series_I/Volume_I/Confessions/Book_XI/Chapter_14 - or more accurately, maybe at https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Nicene_and_Post-Nicene_Fathers:_Series_I/Volume_I/Confessions/Book_XI/Chapter_20?). And that was not easy to find... I'm not even sure if it's in that chapter, or can even be fully found in the english translation.

--Gameplay--

The transitions are slow as molasses. Each time a line ends and we get an inset graphic I have to click twice to make it go to the next at the start which really ruins any flow.

There seems to be something that keeps invisibly selecting the "Back" UI option (it doesn't light up, but it.... does happen), making enter and numpad enter and ever leftclick rewind the dialogue. I'm not sure why... It's kinda hard to read when things go backwards half the time.

Is Insegnante a job title or a name? I kidna sounds like it might mean "teacher" or something. - google says it means "teacher". I recommend translating it.

 

that's impressively redundant... sounds kind of like a bad literal tl from jp though so I suppose it's familiar. (there's actually a reason for it later I see, but it's done maybe a bit too weirdly nevertheless - perhaps "I'm Shirou Tsukuda. Well, at least that's the name of the guy you're looking at."?).

 

Weak spelling tbh

 

girl's name

tl;dr you need an editor or at the very least a proofreader.

Conversation feels unnatural, rushed as if there's a list of plot points to be handed off. The presentation probably doesn't help with the weird way transitions work.

...the difference in graphical quality between the backgrounds and the face inserts is p. huge and honestly jarring. You can call it an artistic choice, but it will turn people off.

All in all, the demo is a huge mess, though I actually like the story concept. The UI is off, the pacing is off, the presentation is off, the writing is off, the graphics are off, though the backgrounds are p. good. The pacing problem is probably at least 30% due to having to click twice at various times when insert images are shown to get to the next text bubble, but in general things seem to jump around a lot in weird ways. Work on your scene transitions - I think it's possible they were just so slow I skipped them by double clicking or something...

I also think it's kind of a pity the nazi guy doesn't actually seem to exist when I google

[WinterfuryZX]

enjoy my broken english:

 

Time doesn't exist, it is only a dimension of the soul. The past does not exist because it isn't anymore, the future does not exist because it is not yet into being, and the present is only a nonexistant instant of separation between the past and the future.

(that's basically my signature, but I'm not part of this project)

EDIT: just use the original in latin.

Edited January 26, 2017 by WinterfuryZX

[WinterfuryZX]

There are no such things in Japan... you should correct it like tnis "sapessi quanti esami ci ho preparato"

edit: wait a minute here I just noticed the classroom is labeled "5-C", where is this placed? (from the ages of the characters, it looks like a 5th "ginnasio"... if this is the case the japanese names are strange then...)

Edited January 26, 2017 by WinterfuryZX